Well if I Answered….

Bird and I were waiting in line to pay a bill. He was playing on my phone when Peanut called. So he gave me the phone but didn’t answer. Because it’s my phone so I should answer it, you know. I would hate for Ian Somerhalder to call me and think he had the wrong number! God forbid!

When I said hello, Peanut very rudely said “WHO’S THIS??????”

I responded, “Uh, your mother, who the heck did you think it was?” Because you know I don’t say bad words and she hasn’t ever heard them! And because I was answering my cell phone! God, I am horrible.

She thought it was Bird. Ok I guess that explains the rudeness because she is almost as hateful to him as she is to me.

But it actually gets better! She says, “BRING ME FOOD. CHICKEN.”

So I say what most parents would say, “Please and thank you would be nice.” And she says what she always says, “YOU’RE WELCOME!!!”

Sigh.

Don’t worry Ian, I will be too surprised when you call to care about your manners.

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7 thoughts on “Well if I Answered….

  1. Who is Ian however you say the last name? I had to look him up…only to find that I’m his forty-something version doppelgänger. No worries, no calls will be coming from me either. 😛

  2. Aw, hell no. If one of my kids said that to me, they’d get a “You know where the food lives. Make something for yourself.” And if they made a spiteful mess out of the kitchen, they’d be cleaning – the kitchen, the bathroom, & any other room in need at the moment. Ask politely, or go without, ungrateful wretch! 😉

      • LOL, sounds like all 3 of my kids. I did tach them young that I couldn’t hear them when they spoke in the “key of whine”, & that backtalk got “angry mom”. But, courtesy & normal speech got “Mom listens”. (Really, I think they just took the attitude to their rooms & cussed me out behind closed doors)

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